“I’m Really Not This Stupid, I Just Pretend For TV”

(CNN) — Former New York Giants receiver David Tyree’s celebrated catch in the closing seconds of Super Bowl XLII was pivotal to his team’s victory. Now out of football, he is trying to claim a last-minute win over another foe — same-sex marriage.


Tyree made the comments in a video released Wednesday by the National Organization for Marriage, which is spearheading opposition to the bill. The legislation must now clear the Republican-controlled State Senate where its fate is uncertain.

His disapproval of gay marriage is based on religious as well as secular grounds, Tyree said.

“Marriage is the only relationship that actually mirrors the relationship with God,” he said.

He also argued that same-sex parents are ill-equipped to raise a child of the opposite sex.

“You can’t teach something that you don’t have,” Tyree said in the video. “So two men will never be able to teach a woman how to be a woman.”

Dear CNN,

So I couldn’t help but notice you were interviewing Mr. Tyree this morning on one of your newsprograms and the anchor actually asked the question (I’m paraphrasing, because I couldn’t find a transcript): “what’s unnatural about gay marriage”? Really? We are at the point that someone in the CNN newsroom is so stupid that they have to ask this question. I mean, I would hope that even intellectually honest pro-gay marriage folks understand that there is nothing natural about their push to redefine the institution — they are doing so for reasons (in their minds) of justice or fairness or equality or whatever liberal buzzword you want to use. But to question the natural law basis of marriage? God bless Dave Tyree. Even though I’m a Bears fan and I’m supposed to hate the Giants, I may have to now root for the Giants whenever the Bears are out of the playoff picture.

About Fake Herzog

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